Divorce Essay Samples

Marriage has a huge influence on everyone’s lives. When we are children, living in a single parent family is very different from the environments of those whose parents are married. As adults, our marital status can be one of the biggest impacts on our current and future plans. Unfortunately, even though marriage is supposed to be a loving union between two people, it often ends in a bitter divorce. This can have negative effects on everyone in the family, including the mother, father, and children. All areas of their lives can be affected, such as financial, emotional, social, and physical.
Women are the most likely to initiate a divorce and after this occurs, 90% of mothers will have custody of the children (O’Connell Corcoran). This can be difficult because poverty is also a problem for single mothers, with their annual income averaging $12,200 (O’Connell Corcoran). Fortunately, women are more likely to receive emotional support from friends and family members than men to help them get through their stress.
Fear and anxiety are common emotions that women often feel while going through a divorce. The reasons behind this are usually because women are not sure if they will be able to handle being a single mother, especially while handing the new struggles in life. Many have a problem with the “what ifs,” and fear all of the things that could go wrong (Holbrook). This can make it hard to think on the positive side. Trying to put in the extra energy in many areas of life can be exasperating, especially when relying on a husband is no longer an option.
As compared to women, men tend to have more difficulties with emotional adjustments. This could be due to the loss of intimacy and social connection, financial problems, and uncertainties regarding their children (O’Connell Corcoran). Men are also more inclined to be introverted and try to deal with this stressful issues by themselves, and not seek help from their family and friends (Sharma). It can usually be noticed that women show emotions more than their male counterparts. Totally holding up one’s anger and sadness is not good for a person’s psychological health. During a divorce, men who do not express their negative emotions can become extremely depressed over time, only making things worse (McHugh). Another major men are faced with is being able to spend time with their children. Many fathers only see their children every other weekend when their marriage comes to an end. This can have a traumatic effect on their relationships, and they might not be as close to their children as they would like to be. Men could also become angry if their wives begin dating other men, and the children are in the presence of these people.
Children often have very vivid, clear memories of exactly what they thought happened, especially when they heard the bad news. For example, being able to give flawless descriptions of the surroundings when they got the initial shock. Many children might never forget where they were, what they were doing, and who was around when they were told that their parents would no longer be living together forever.
Divorce can be a depressing experience but luckily, it will not last forever. It has been illustrated that children do not take an extremely long time to mentally and emotionally heal after their parents separate. The results in a study performed in 2002 revealed that children experience anxiety, anger, shock, and disbelief shortly after their parents’ divorce (Arkowitz & Lilienfeld). However, a majority of the children did not seem to struggle with long-term influences from the event. It was determined that approximately two years after the divorce, the children’s negative reactions to their parents’ actions were nearly gone (Arkowitz & Lilienfeld). It is nice to know that most children will not spend the rest of their lives feeling upset, or guilty, because they believe that the marriage was ruined because of something that they did wrong. Parents should explain to their children that divorce is not something that is uncommon, and their families’ lives will not be ruined forever because of this. But, it will not be easy at first.
It depends on each child to determine exactly how they will react to the situation, as there are some cases in which the children may not appear to be upset at all. When children are present when their parents are fighting and they see anger in a marriage, they could actually feel relieved to find that they will not have to deal with this anymore. This is something that parents should never let their kids witness. If children do see their parents fight, there is the possibility that they could begin to dislike one of the parents because of this (Emery). After a divorce, careful plans should be made to keep the kids out of areas where it could be possible for arguments to occur (Kids Health).
When people think of divorce, they often think of how it hurts families, but it also affects our society. Although people with financial difficulties are not less likely to get married, they are more likely to get divorced once they do so (Berlin). As previously mentioned, many single mothers live in poverty, which leads to the increased need for help from the government. Government welfare for has risen from 8 percent to over 25 percent in the last 50 years, placing a huge financial burden on our country (Effects of Divorce on Women). Financial outcomes from divorce vary from country to country. For example, German men who divorce fare better than U.S. men who divorce, and German women fare worse than U.S. women (Henley & Pasley). Not surprisingly, in countries where women are discriminated against, they are always looked down on worse than their husbands (Henley & Pasley). This demonstrates that there can be a wide variety of difficulties to deal with during the process of divorce, and it can vary greatly from place to place and marriage to marriage.

Works Cited

Arkowitz, Hal., & Scott Lilienfeld. “Is Divorce Bad for Children?” Scientific American. 2013.
Web. Mar. 2015.
Berlin, Gordon. “The Effects of Marriage and Divorce on Families and Children.” mdrc
Building Knowledge to Improve Social Society. 2004. Web. Mar. 2015.
“Effects of Divorce of Women.” Sex & Relationships. 2011. Web. Mar. 2015.
Emery, Robert. “The Truth about Children and Divorce”. Journal of Family Psychology. 2000.
Web. Mar. 2015.
“Helping Your Child Through a Divorce”. Kids Health. n.d. Web.
Henley, Kari., & Kay Pasley. “Divorce – Effects on Children, Effects on Couples, Effects on
Parents.” 2015. Web. Mar. 2015.
Holbrook, Cindy. “Top Five Emotional Effects of Divorce.” Coaching for Divorced Women.
2015. Web. Mar. 2015.
McHugh, Tiffany. “3 Reasons Divorce is Harder on Men than Women.” The Huffington Post.
11 Mar. 2013. Web. Mar. 2015.
O’Connell Corcoran, Kathleen. “Psychological and Emotional Aspects of Divorce”.
Mediate.com. 1997. Web. Mar. 2015.
Sharma, Sandeep. “Divorce Affects Men More”. MENSXP. 2013. Web. Mar. 2015.